Epic Fail: The Daiquiri Bay Knife Fight and My Descent into Alcoholism

Attention class-- Please raise your hand if you believed I had the constitution to be a non-drinking sober person. Anyone?  Anyone?  Well, to hell with you all, you were right.

That Jeana Richard with the evil red eyes?  She just might be the devil.  That is a chocolate daiquiri and it was absolutely fabulous.

But in my defense-- I had only moments prior had a near-death experience, and had no choice but to turn to alcohol to calm my nerves.  Yes, it's true.  we were at Daiquiri Bay, a lovely little daq shop near our Metarie home when, hark, what sound but a woman screaming?  Nay, not really screaming.  Bellowing.  Like a cow.  Apparently some crazy NOLA East boy pulled a knife on her because she was being drunken and annoying.  She told him it was very disrespectful to say "fuck" in front of her.  Or she told him it was disgusting that he threw up in the bathroom.  Or something.  I don't know... Either way he pulled a knife but was driven away by a pack of angry regular customers.  The boy fled on foot and the police came.  They asked us is we saw anything.  We didn't.  

Later, we went to Frat House and I had more to drink.  Oh, alcohol.  It's good to have you back.